Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Are you insulting me?

A couple weeks ago before our nightly walk (I wish is was every night, I have to try to be creative to get them to go eagerly but I keep trying)...
 At least once a day (if we leave the house) someone tells me, "you have your hands full." And it really bugs me. A lot. I can't quite figure it out. Most of the time, I just smile and don't say anything but sometimes I try to say something witty. "Oh I sure do and it's great" is about as witty as I get because really, I am offended.

Are they insulting me? Yesterday, some guy leaving the golf course club house on my street STOPPED his car and yelled it to me out his window. All I was doing was taking 2 of my 4 to the bus stop. We were strolling along talking about birds and squirrels. Yep, that's full.

Are they thinking I am a loon for taking kids out of the house? I have to go out and most of the time my kids are with me. My Big Tall Hubby is not home much and we have to eat (which explains all our trips to the grocery.)

Are they thinking I am a haggard mess (just a note, I always wear make up and rarely do I go out without washing my hair so I don't look terrible- now if it's raining, my hair does look like a big fuzz ball but that's another post!) dragging my four kids to the grocery yet again? I would understand if I was yelling at them (or spanking them like I saw someone do yesterday at none other than Walmart) or if they were crying or fighting.

But my kids are pretty good for the most part. Really. I promise. Of course they have meltdowns and I'm sure I have talked sternly to them through gritted teeth but this is not something that happens very often. I have lots of tools and tricks to keep them entertained as we go about our daily life (i.e. errands and activities).

I would also "get it" if I was say pushing a stroller, holding a toddler's hand and carrying my books into the library and trying to open the door. Yes, then my hands are full and if you could kindly hold the door (which most annoying rude people do NOT!), I'd appreciate it. And I would gladly return the favor if I could someday.

So why in the heck do people say that? I do have my hands full. I love how full they are. If I was younger (and I could convince my Big Tall Hubby, I'd have more to fill them up!). Being a mom is what I do best. I would have never guessed it when I was a teen ager or even before that when I was five and I thought I would be a "Solid Gold" dancer but changing diapers, baking cookies, and taking care of my family is my calling for sure. So I just don't understand why someone insists on making a snide remark when there is no reason for it.

So to the dirty, grimy, annoying-followed-me-throughout-the-whole-store man at the grocery store today who told me, "boy, you've got your hands full:" yes I do, and that's the way I like it! Hmph!


Karen said...

I chuckled as I read this post, because I get that comment too...all the time. It doesn't really bother me that much because sometimes I think people just don't quite know what to say when they see someone with 4 children in tow. It seems that people consider that to be 'a lot' of kids.

And, I'm with you...if I were younger (and my hubby were on board) I'd have more kids. I always thought 6 would be a nice number.

Maybe your comeback to "Wow. Your hands are full" could be "Yeah. And, I wish they were fuller!" :)

Jenny said...

Good one Karen! I think I'll use that one next time, like tomorrow probably.