Thursday, January 20, 2011

A Rock and A Hard Place

I am definitely stuck. Help me please.

The rock part:
OK, Parker (age 5) sleeps like a rock. Seriously. The kid doesn't move once he falls asleep. I have been so neurotic as to go and roll him over so he won't get a smooched face or sore ear from sleeping in one position too long. Not a bag thing really, don't judge my crazy mom habits, you know you have them too! Anyway, so he sleeps pretty well, hardly ever a bad dream. Here is the problem, he does not get up at night to go "potty" (yes I still call it that, and in public, again, don't judge! If you hear a grown woman ((Me)) saying, "I have to go potty" you'll know it's me, just say hi and let me go for goodness sake!) Back to my rock: Parker has been wearing pullups at night for over a year. I really thought he'd grow out of them by now. He was a really quick potty-trainer, an A+ student if I ever had one. This week, I have washed everything on his bed, THREE DAYS IN A ROW people! Do you know how annoying this is? Of course you do, you're mommies. I mean I already do three loads of laundry a day, I can't really add more without getting a second washer and dryer! I have tried limiting his drinks in the evening and waking him up to "go." But really I haven't seen consistent results yet. I am contemplating getting one of those alarms that hook up to the child's undies that senses when they go and then alarms them to train them to wake up. They are really expensive but it might be the only choice I have. Any ideas?

The Hard Place part:
Zoe (age 8) has been getting invited to sleepovers since she was in kindergarten! Yikes! Can we just let our little girls be little people?! Anyway, when she was in kindergarten I just told the parents we had some other plans whether we did or not. Then in first grade I would let her go but I would pick her up at 10 or 11:00. She didn't really mind. She was even glad because she said she really didn't want to sleep there anyway. So onto now, second grade, she has been invited to yet another sleepover with a group of girls I know well and their moms are nice and ok (again, no judgements on me, I definitely check out moms of my daughter's friends!) but I just don't know if my Zoe is ready for a sleepover. How do you know? I remember my first sleepover. It was terrible. I was in second grade. I really liked all the girls, they were in my class at school. I thought they were the nicest girls in the world until I spent the night with them. I was terrified when I saw them prank calling people, teasing others and trying all the mean girl tricks in the world (i.e. putting your hand in cold water while you sleep to see if you'd pee in your sleeping bag, putting your bra in the freezer, etc.). I refused to sleep, I remember sitting up against a wall to stay awake and I did not go to another sleepover for a long time after that one. These were supposedly "good" girls from nice families. Don't even get me started on the sleepovers that took place in my teen aged years. Gosh, those girls were awful. I was always the one saying, "gee girls, should we really be doing this?" EEEEEEKKK! So am I just being overprotective because of my own bad experiences? I know I am a total worry wart but I think most moms are. Have any of you let your child have sleepovers or go to them? When did they go? How did you know they were ready? Darn it anyway, why don't these kids come with instruction manuals?


Jill said...

Hi Jenny,

I wouldn't stress too much over his potty training at his age for bedtime. That usually takes a little longer to master :-)
As for the sleepovers... Hayley just had her first a couple weeks ago and she is in 4th. I don't think you are being overprotective, times have changed. The reason she went to this one is because I knew the Mom well. It was also only 5 kids total, plus Hayley is already asking to have one for her birthday. But she's 9 almost 10 in May so I'm trying to loosen the apron strings a little :-) But it's hard.... Good luck!

Becca said...

If it helps I have heard from A LOT of mothers that their boys have the same problem. I think it's very normal and takes time for them to learn to wake up for that feeling. I totally understand the laundry thing! It will get least less frequent soon. Hang in there!

And the sleepover thing...why can't kids be kids anymore? I mean little kids don't need to do sleepovers but that's what they all want to do. It's especially hard when you feel like you are the only one who is concerned! Colin went to a sleepover a
few months ago where I actually asked the Mom where her husband's guns were and if they were locked up? {a lot of people hunt around here so most people have guns...scares me half to death}. She was very nice, but I'm sure she thought I was a nut. Don't care though...We have to watch out for our kids. The end. So, don't feel overprotective, you are doing what you should!

Jen said...

Get some thick pads for the bed to cut down on the laundry. Hopefully it wont be much longer.

I think you should ask her if she thinks she is ready to sleep there all night. If you know the parents and the other girls...that is great because in a few short years she'll be wanting to go to sleep overs at new friends houses etc.
I used to tell the other parents that I was a freak, not ready etc... I would even ask if they had guns in their home.
I say, since you feel good about the parents...let her do what she feels like she can. Then just tell her to call you anytime if she needs to come home.
It is really hard for sure.